Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Love and Marriage


This week Jeremy and I celebrated two wonderful years of marriage. It's crazy how much you can learn about love, companionship, maturity, faith and communication in two short years.

Here's a list of a few things I have learned in marriage...so far:

1. It's fun to "do life" with someone and grow in faith together. Jeremy and I have made our faith the center of our marriage. We understand the importance of loving God and loving others, and we have been overly-blessed with our faith community. I have learned that growing spiritually isn't always easy, and it's so nice to have a companion to talk through those difficult conversations.

2. I can be very selfish sometimes. My husband is extremely selfless and so not high-maintenance. But over the last two years, it has been pretty cool to see myself become more self-aware and make more selfless decisions. I don't know how any marriage could survive with selfish desires always in play.

3. It's easier to just talk about it rather than holding it in and letting it stew. Also, when I talk about it, I need to remember the conversation is about "us" or "we" not a conversation of blame on one person. I hope to always choose my words wisely. Jeremy is much more thoughtful, in that he thinks before he speaks and he is always so articulate. I, on the other hand, tend to say what I am feeling/thinking even when it might not be the popular thing to say. I suppose that's a good and bad thing since honesty is the best policy, but in a marriage I hope to put selfish motives aside and come to the discussion table with the relationship in mind.

4. This is something I learned from my Margaret a long time ago: Don't ever pay a bill or mow the lawn because if you do, you will have to do it the rest of your life. :) I have learned that I am so lucky to be able to depend on my husband to handle our finances and take care of the dirty work. We talk in depth about finances, but I don't ever worry about any of it being taken care of.

5. Life is too short to fill it with drama. Marriage (and Jeremy) has taught me to enjoy the simple pleasures in life and frankly to mind my own business.

6. My friend Amanda told me once that it's very important to surround yourself with other supportive and healthy couples. We have an awesome group of friends here in Austin, and I have learned that this "family" of other young married couples is a huge blessing.

7. I have learned that I like being a homemaker. I like planning out our meals for the week, vacuuming, decorating the house, etc. I have found that one of the best parts about being married is just coming home to your family and your comfortable home.

8. When hard times come Jeremy is encouraging, practical and supportive. He speaks truth into the situation while at the same time making me understand it will be okay. I have learned that these are the times when our marriage becomes our team and we fight for each other and lift each other up.

9. I have learned that marriage is a gift and my husband is a gift. I can't imagine life without him and I hope to never take our relationship for granted. We are always hugging, kissing, holding hands, etc. (You know, all the roll-your-eyes, lovey-dovey stuff.) Those acts of physical touch are important non-verbal ways of saying "I know you are a gift and I treasure you." I hope we do that forever and even around our kids so they will know the importance of showing love.

10. I will stick with one more for now. I have learned that it's nice to have someone who knows you well enough to know your flaws and loves you regardless.

I hope this wasn't too cheesy. Marriage isn't seen as sacred anymore by a lot of people, and I feel like it's important to show others how much I value mine.

Happy 2yr. Anniversary to my Jeremy.